As I Am, Now

The crack of dawn does not scare me anymore
Unkept promises do not, too
I have turned deaf
To what the world has to say
Or give

The nights lure me into sleep easier now
The eyes are not anymore afraid of what I will see
In my dreams
My feelings are free
From hope and expectations

I walk now, after I’ve run too far, too long
Chasing something I was not sure I needed
And I see the road better
Now that I’m walking
And humming, to my heart’s content

I give more now
And I receive even more
Gratitude, I know now, is sharing
I only have myself to be grateful for
And what I can to for others

I give up more now
On the wars I know I cannot win
I keep my thoughts to myself
And spared a few hearts from breaking
With my words, should I have said them

I am calmer now
Like those Sunday mornings
When you have a whole day
Having the possibilities of doing things
But not necessarily doing it

I shall remain, maybe for a long while
In this state I’m in
Where the worries of the world
Do not anymore occupy my conversations
With my mind

Copyright ©2009 Aida Rahayu Mahmud