The Ex Factor

I had a conversation with my ex.

Yes, he got married, that robbed away our right to be an item, but it didn't rob away our friendship. I realized that only recently. We started as friends, and in the course of our relationship, we learned that we were each other's best friend. And through the break-up I surrendered to many nights of mourn because I had lost my best friend. Now, after nearly 2 years of him being married, I find him where he was before-in 'The Best Friend' seat.

Maybe it's in the way he addresses my problems, maybe it's in his way of saying things, and maybe it's just the sound of his voice that I find very comforting. But that's what he does, he comforts me, in ways I don't think even he knows. And comfort, I believe, is what a best friend is for.

I remember how my girlfriends (God bless them) talked me out of thinking about him (or their attempts to) and how they put him in 'The Bad Guy' spotlight when he 'decided' to marry someone else. I understand they were concerned. I understand they wanted to show they were concerned. So I excused their mocking and name-callings and voodoo spells on my ex, as I thought that's the way, the typical way of the female species in showing care for their 'injured' member of species. I appreciated all their efforts, the name-callings as well, but deep down inside, I knew they didn't understand, or at least see it the way I do. I was mourning for the loss of a friend, not the loss of a 'boyfriend'. I too, didn't realize it if the break-up didn't happen.

So last Friday saw the day when I found comfort again. I had a conversation with my ex, and I told him everything that has bothered me recently. And as usual, he put a spell on me. He listened to every detail and told me things I already know, things I have told myself a million times before. But when he says it, he makes them valid.

There’s a love between us, a bond that not even time can erase. He was my friend and I thank God, he still is; although he might not be there with me to hold my hand, at least I know he would if he could. There are places in my soul that nobody can reach, but him. And I feel it is going to stay that way for a long, long time.